My Miracles

Im a Mom. Today it's Mother's day. If last year you would have told me that I would be the Mom to two beautiful children I wouldn't have believed you....but I have learned that miracles come when we least expect them and both of my children are true miracles - as all children are. It has been an incredible year. We have been blessed more than words can say. Skyler Grant joined our family. He has brought such joy and love into our home.....I forgot how much work little ones can be...but OH THE JOY......his smile, his laugh, his little hands reaching out for me, the way he smells right after his bath....the way he looks at me when someone else is holding him....and the way he LOVES to snuggle with his Mommy when he is tired. Our little one is such a joy. And my beautiful Cassie. She turns 10 in just a few days - I find myself wondering HOW DID THAT HAPPEN? I don't know...but it did. Cassie and I are finding out what it's like to both have very strong opinions about things - and while some days I think we make eachother a little CRAZY.....well the love is always there - the love will ALWAYS be there. She is my heart...she is my calm, she is my sweet, she is my imagination, she is my deep thinker, she is my good.....she is my Cassie. I often think about my life, and about why things work out the way they do...and I wish I had ALL of the answers to that question, but one answer that I do have, is that I know that God loves me....whenever I look into the faces of my beautiful children - the children I wanted more then breath.....well there is no way to question my Heavenly Father's love for me. Last year I remember blogging about how I felt about my Mother....and I want to once again thank her....for everything. I wish I were more eloquent or more poetic....but I hope she knows how I feel and I hope that saying Thank you Mom....and I Love You....just let her know how much I do...love her. And for the other Mother's in my life. My amazing Mother in Law....who raised my amazing Husband.....how grateful I am for the woman that she is, and for the son that she raised. For all of my sisters - born and in law....for the amazing Moms that they are. For the amazing women I work with in church....how they are mother's to SO many. Where would the world be without Mothers? I have to...on this most special day....thank the two TRUE Mothers.....the two Mother's who put the needs of their children before their own, and sacrificed so much....so that I could hear the words "Mommy.....I love you". Thank You Nicole and Corinna - thank you forever....thank you for blessing my life so much and for giving so much of yourselves. I will never be able to thank you enough or repay you for my most amazing gift......my sweet children. Thank You. Happy Mothers Day to all the amazing Women in my life. To Mothers.

WHEW!

HOLY COW....it's been a busy couple of weeks. I knew that I would be busy as the new RS Pres. But I guess I didn't realize just HOW busy I would be....and my sweet little Skyler - well I couldn't do all I do if he wasn't such a good baby. He is such an ANGEL! I know you don't come to read this to hear about all the things that are keeping me busy, but yesterday was an amazing day....and I need a place to share it so if you want info just about Skyler....scroll down to the end - and you will find him...... So yesterday was Stake Conference - and it was WONDERFUL. The Saturday session was about the great need there is for LDS Foster Familes. Stories were shared about lives changed by people willing to open their homes and love kids......and stories were shared about lives that were ripped apart because there was no one to save and love these poor lost kids. It was inspiring and just reminded Joel and I of our goal to adopt a older sibling group.....when Skyler gets a LITTLE older. ANYWAY.....so that was Saturday, Sunday conference was great....a lot of inspiring stories....after conference we rushed home, loaded the car - after emptying our fridge....the RS sisters in the ward donated food so that we could provide a luncheon for the family of a part member family in our ward where the Mom was being baptized, the father was being ordained an Elder, and their sweet baby girl was being blessed...>WHAT A DAY for them. SO....we rushed to the church to get everything set up - and it was wonderful......we fed the family and cleaned up and then I RUSHED to a sister in our ward who was just released from the hospital....she recently had a double mastectomy and had been very ill.....so I went to visit and spend time with her.....she is as close to terminal as it gets - but she is trying her best to hold on....she is really scared. After that I RUSHED back home to get the fam.....and we all RUSHED to the Stake Center....AGAIN......for the baptism of Anna Sevey. What an amazing story for this sweet family. When I moved in the ward I NEVER would have guessed that she wasn't a member - she came to EVERY single activity.....she was just so involved and sweet - but I found out later that she had never been baptized.....anyway....like I said, her husband was ordained an Elder, her baby was blessed and she was baptized....she has 3 kids and her oldest boy, a sweet 4 year old gave the opening prayer, and I think that was the highlight of my day.....all by himself, he asked Heavenly Father to bless his family, to bless everyone who came to be with them that day....and he thanked his Heavenly Father that his family could finally be saved. HIS WORDS......it was just too sweet.....I was bawling. After the baptism, we served refreshments.......and FINALLY - I came home and LITERALLY Crashed.....Joel saved me of course....Cassie was in a RARE mood so we left her at home.......YEP....by herself! She played Wii Fit......HER CHOICE......but HOLY COW....what a DAY!.....and now for the sweet tender mercy......as I fell into bed Saturday night - and as my head hit the pillow, I said a prayer. I prayed that I would be able to sleep - that I had a huge day and needed some sleep so that I could do a good job for Anna's family and be able to handle everything (I am SO PMSing right now) . When I woke up at 6am I was in SHOCK! Skyler....my sweet little boy slept for 7 hours STRAIGHT......and he woke up with a COMPLETELY DRY DIAPER!!! Scared me to DEATH!! I was really worried about him......I mean how many 2 month olds sleep 7 hours and DON'T PEE ONCE!!! But.....as soon as I got him dressed - he peed on and through EVERYTHING.....dont' know where he was storing it all....but BOTH his legs got shaking and he just LET R FLY!!! Peed on everything and I had to change him....which was OK because I had actually slept and felt GREAT....which was my gift from Heavenly Father - because last night it was business as usual for him....up every 2.5 3 hours and SOAKED every time - don't worry he was at the doctor today and he said if it was an all the time thing we would worry, but it was probably nothing....he just slept deep - well our DR is LDS and I told him about my prayer and he said SEE....you were just being blessed - and I say AMEN to that! And for those of you who think I have just 1 kid named Skyler.....yes - I remember I have another one and YES she is still AMAZING.....she has been giving us the BEST FHE Lessons that she prepares herself, we are reading the Isiah chapters in the BOM and she actually understands and asks questions - where does she COME from? I didn't have a CLUE or a CARE about the Isiah chapters till my MISSION!! She is growing up TOO Fast - seriously.......my baby girl is almost 10 years old! CAN'T believe that! She loves her brother - is KICKIN BUTT in Karate....(no pun intended) and is rockin the house at school.....pretty much a straight A student - which means a lot because as a 4th grader she is doing 5th grade work - GO CASS!!!! And now.....drumm roll please......here is some video of skyler - he is so amazing.....the one where Joel is trying to make him smile is my favorite - it's not because Skyler smiles - it's because it's so cute to hear my big burly husband talk so silly to his baby boy.....enough to MELT MY HEART!!!! Oh....and that was just ONE day!!!!! PRAY FOR ME!!!

Barely Holdin' On!

Well, it has been a CRAZY month! For those of you who don't know.....I am the new Relief Society President for my ward......yep - I was sustained and set apart last week! HOLY COW it's a big job - SO much to do.....and it seems like there is just not enough hours in the day to get everything done. I know I may seem crazy, but I am enjoying it so much. My counselors are amazing women - truly....and I am really excited to work with them and get to know them better. So.....that is my reasoning for not blogging for SUCH a long time - actually, I want to just spend most of my time staring at and holding my Skyler. He is so precious! We are having so much fun with him.....he is such a little man, but is such a HUGE addition to our home. Cassie thinks he's boring, and I suppose to her he is, but ME.....well I am enjoying EVERY SINGLE "BORING" moment I have with him! So - for those of you who have been waiting and wondering....here are a few new pictures.....and a video of my beautiful little man! If you listen carefully, you can hear his little sleeping sounds - he kind of coos when he sleeps.......Mom and Sarah can explain, but it is the CUTEST sweetest thing EVER!! Love my little man, Love my Cassie and LOVE my big man! My life is busy.....but oh so sweet!!!

The first time I saw your face......

My beautiful, precious little boy is here! Skyler Grant Lynn made his entrance into this world on Monday morning at 8:01 am screaming his little head off! He weighed 7lbs 14.6 oz, was 20 inches long and his head was 13 cm around ( don't women dilate to 10 - you do the math...starts with an E). He is just SO beautiful! Joel and I find ourselves staring at him because sometimes it just doesn't seem real that he is actually here - FINALLY here and he is PERFECT!!

We started out at the hospital Sunday night, with the plan that they would SLOWLY start inducing her labor - They were supposed to administer a gel that would strip her membrane - they were supposed to put the gel on every 4 hours and she was supposed to have 3 treatments. They started the first one around 12 am and by 4am she was dilated to a 5! She went from completely closed to a 5 in 4 hours YOU GO GIRL! The hardest part of the whole night was waiting for her epidural. She was in SO much pain and was having such a hard time and there was NOTHING I could do to help her. I felt so helpless - and that was when all of the emotions hit. I realized that this beautiful girl, this young girl was going through all of this pain....all of this fear.......for ME! It was overwhelming. I am so grateful that Corinna's aunt was there because as Corinna's Mom comforted her, Sheryl comforted me. Once they finally got the epidural, and it FINALLY kicked in - things were ALOT easier for ALL of us to bare. Labor went REALLY fast after that and the rest was just waiting for it to all finish. We had a nurse that was MORE than ready to get off her shift and just wasn't that friendly, or helpful - but when the shift changed we got the BEST NURSE IN THE UNIVERSE!! She was this tiny little lady from India, in her mid 50's probably and she was SO wonderful! She just got right to work, helped Corinna get ready and got us all to work. Corinna and I were holding hands while she was pushing - I was the one saying......pushpushpushpushpushpushpushpushpush and she worked her HEAD off to get him here.......after several pushes, Skyler made his entrance into the world! Corinna was AMAZING......truly. They didn't hand him to Corinna, but took him right to the incubator and started to check him out and clean him up. I was the one who cut the cord - which was SO scary and amazing! I was shaking so badly I was scared I would cut him! They had me give him his bath, which was SO much fun.......and they wrapped him up and handed him to me. I wish that there were words to describe how it felt to hold my son in my arms for the first time....there just aren't words. Corinna didn't hold him until several hours later, they just let me have my time with him, and I will be forever grateful for that. they got us all done, organized and ready to go to recovery. Our nurse - WHO ROCKED and LOVED us.....put us all in the nicest and biggest room, because she knew there would be so many of us. The hospital had a room off of the nursery that I could have stayed in with Skyler, but I chose to stay in the room with Corinna. I know that it would have been hard for MANY people to do this - and harder for everyone to understand, but it was the right thing to do. Corinna, Skyler and I spent some beautiful and amazing hours together - and it helped Corinna see how much I loved him, and helped her to realize she was making the correct choice for Skyler. She said some beautiful things, but my favorite was that she didn't give birth to her son, but she gave birth to mine, and I also love how she said that he was not meant to be hers, but he was meant to be mine. With everything she had gone through, she still found a way to comfort me. She is one of the most amazing women I will ever have the privilege to meet. I love her SO much! We stayed together, in the same hospital room, from Monday morning, until Wednesday around noon - and I don't think I slept more than 4 hours the ENTIRE time.....in fact I know I didn't. I was SO exhausted and emotional, I almost lost it several times, but the Lord blessed me with the strength I needed. We signed the temporary custody paperwork on Tuesday afternoon, and we could have taken him home then - he could have been discharged, but Corinna was staying until Wednesday, and I felt and said that she brought him him, she can carry him out - and that is what we did. We all left together on Wednesday morning around 11 - and Joel, Cassie and I brought our beautiful little boy home. Again, I can't describe the feelings of joy and love. Joel and I were both overwhelmed with joy. Skyler is amazing!

SO.......we had to wait for paperwork and in Arizona, the law is that the Birth Mother has to wait for 72 hours before she can sign her relinquishment papers - which for us meant Thursday afternoon. Corinna could have chosen to have the ceremony wherever she wanted, or we could have, but she chose to have it at our house, which I greatly appreciated. It was so beautiful - seriously - it was so beautiful! When the case workers arrived they told us that the judge had signed our papers on the 15th of December - but we didn't know that until the DAY before we were supposed to sign! STRESS - but they came in and we were THRILLED! They took Corinna and had her sign all of her paperwork, which she did willingly, and then they had Joel and I go in and sign our paperwork - which was AMAZING...and then we had a beautiful little meeting - where we could each go around and talk about our feelings about our whole situation. The meeting included Joel, Cassie and I, Sharon - the case worker, Corinna's parents, sister and Corinna, and of COURSE our Skyler. It was so beautiful. The emotions were so raw and real and precious and the spirit in our home was so beautiful. I wont share everything that was said, because some things I want to keep for myself, but trust me when I say - there is NO doubt that Skyler is meant to be ours. SO - what does that mean - everything is signed. We can finalize in the next 3 to 6 months and then everything will be official official, but for now, there is no going back - it's a done deal. Skyler is ours and we are THRILLED. What does that mean for all of us going forward - No idea , but Corinna came over and we ate dinner, hung out and visited for several hours and it was lovely to have her here. She is amazing, and I miss her when I don't see her so ours is a very unique, and special relationship and I am so blessed to know her, and to have her in my life. This is a short version of everything, but for now it's the best I can do. I am MISSING Skyler, and I am getting TIRED!!! SO - here he is.....ENJOY!!!