Saturday, January 2, 2010

The first time I saw your face......

My beautiful, precious little boy is here! Skyler Grant Lynn made his entrance into this world on Monday morning at 8:01 am screaming his little head off! He weighed 7lbs 14.6 oz, was 20 inches long and his head was 13 cm around ( don't women dilate to 10 - you do the math...starts with an E). He is just SO beautiful! Joel and I find ourselves staring at him because sometimes it just doesn't seem real that he is actually here - FINALLY here and he is PERFECT!!
We started out at the hospital Sunday night, with the plan that they would SLOWLY start inducing her labor - They were supposed to administer a gel that would strip her membrane - they were supposed to put the gel on every 4 hours and she was supposed to have 3 treatments. They started the first one around 12 am and by 4am she was dilated to a 5! She went from completely closed to a 5 in 4 hours YOU GO GIRL! The hardest part of the whole night was waiting for her epidural. She was in SO much pain and was having such a hard time and there was NOTHING I could do to help her. I felt so helpless - and that was when all of the emotions hit. I realized that this beautiful girl, this young girl was going through all of this pain....all of this fear.......for ME! It was overwhelming. I am so grateful that Corinna's aunt was there because as Corinna's Mom comforted her, Sheryl comforted me. Once they finally got the epidural, and it FINALLY kicked in - things were ALOT easier for ALL of us to bare. Labor went REALLY fast after that and the rest was just waiting for it to all finish. We had a nurse that was MORE than ready to get off her shift and just wasn't that friendly, or helpful - but when the shift changed we got the BEST NURSE IN THE UNIVERSE!! She was this tiny little lady from India, in her mid 50's probably and she was SO wonderful! She just got right to work, helped Corinna get ready and got us all to work. Corinna and I were holding hands while she was pushing - I was the one saying......pushpushpushpushpushpushpushpushpush and she worked her HEAD off to get him here.......after several pushes, Skyler made his entrance into the world! Corinna was AMAZING......truly. They didn't hand him to Corinna, but took him right to the incubator and started to check him out and clean him up. I was the one who cut the cord - which was SO scary and amazing! I was shaking so badly I was scared I would cut him! They had me give him his bath, which was SO much fun.......and they wrapped him up and handed him to me. I wish that there were words to describe how it felt to hold my son in my arms for the first time....there just aren't words. Corinna didn't hold him until several hours later, they just let me have my time with him, and I will be forever grateful for that. they got us all done, organized and ready to go to recovery. Our nurse - WHO ROCKED and LOVED us.....put us all in the nicest and biggest room, because she knew there would be so many of us. The hospital had a room off of the nursery that I could have stayed in with Skyler, but I chose to stay in the room with Corinna. I know that it would have been hard for MANY people to do this - and harder for everyone to understand, but it was the right thing to do. Corinna, Skyler and I spent some beautiful and amazing hours together - and it helped Corinna see how much I loved him, and helped her to realize she was making the correct choice for Skyler. She said some beautiful things, but my favorite was that she didn't give birth to her son, but she gave birth to mine, and I also love how she said that he was not meant to be hers, but he was meant to be mine. With everything she had gone through, she still found a way to comfort me. She is one of the most amazing women I will ever have the privilege to meet. I love her SO much! We stayed together, in the same hospital room, from Monday morning, until Wednesday around noon - and I don't think I slept more than 4 hours the ENTIRE time.....in fact I know I didn't. I was SO exhausted and emotional, I almost lost it several times, but the Lord blessed me with the strength I needed. We signed the temporary custody paperwork on Tuesday afternoon, and we could have taken him home then - he could have been discharged, but Corinna was staying until Wednesday, and I felt and said that she brought him him, she can carry him out - and that is what we did. We all left together on Wednesday morning around 11 - and Joel, Cassie and I brought our beautiful little boy home. Again, I can't describe the feelings of joy and love. Joel and I were both overwhelmed with joy. Skyler is amazing!
SO.......we had to wait for paperwork and in Arizona, the law is that the Birth Mother has to wait for 72 hours before she can sign her relinquishment papers - which for us meant Thursday afternoon. Corinna could have chosen to have the ceremony wherever she wanted, or we could have, but she chose to have it at our house, which I greatly appreciated. It was so beautiful - seriously - it was so beautiful! When the case workers arrived they told us that the judge had signed our papers on the 15th of December - but we didn't know that until the DAY before we were supposed to sign! STRESS - but they came in and we were THRILLED! They took Corinna and had her sign all of her paperwork, which she did willingly, and then they had Joel and I go in and sign our paperwork - which was AMAZING...and then we had a beautiful little meeting - where we could each go around and talk about our feelings about our whole situation. The meeting included Joel, Cassie and I, Sharon - the case worker, Corinna's parents, sister and Corinna, and of COURSE our Skyler. It was so beautiful. The emotions were so raw and real and precious and the spirit in our home was so beautiful. I wont share everything that was said, because some things I want to keep for myself, but trust me when I say - there is NO doubt that Skyler is meant to be ours. SO - what does that mean - everything is signed. We can finalize in the next 3 to 6 months and then everything will be official official, but for now, there is no going back - it's a done deal. Skyler is ours and we are THRILLED. What does that mean for all of us going forward - No idea , but Corinna came over and we ate dinner, hung out and visited for several hours and it was lovely to have her here. She is amazing, and I miss her when I don't see her so ours is a very unique, and special relationship and I am so blessed to know her, and to have her in my life. This is a short version of everything, but for now it's the best I can do. I am MISSING Skyler, and I am getting TIRED!!! SO - here he is.....ENJOY!!!

7 comments:

Kasey said...

What an amazing experience. You need to catch some Z's any chance you get!

Cindy Smith said...

I am so excited/happy/relieved that everything went so well, I can't wait to see the little guy in person! He is definitely a cutie in his photos! I loved reading your post, thanks for sharing with us all the little details since we couldn't be there.

Dan, Pam and Family said...

Wow,
Corrina must be an amazing person, I wish she could feel even a tiny bit of the love and admiration we have for her and how her unselfishness has blessed so many more lives then she will ever know.
Skyler is so Handsome! I can't get over that HAIR! I don't think Andie will have that much hair when she is one.
I'm so jealous that Mom and Sarah get to come be with you. I can't wait to hold Skyler and smother him in Kisses.
The picture of Cassie and Skyler snuggling together tuggs at my heartstrings, How amazingly precious!
I can't even imagine how exhausted Jess must be. I hope you are all able to get some peaceful rest.
All my Love,
Pam

Debbie Hadley said...

No wonder you were exhausted!!! What an amazing spiritual, physical, emotional, and mental experience. Corinna is beautiful...love her hair color! I can't believe how much hair Skylor has! Beautil skin, beautiful face, beautiful spirit, beautiful boy!! CONGRATULATIONS! WE LOVE ALL OF YOU!

youngsters said...

What an amazing experience! Congrats on your new little one. He is definitely a keeper..so sweet! You are the best momma and you deserve him!

Sarah said...

Oh my goodess jess!! what a little angel, he's perfect!!! thank you so much for posting all of that, I know your exhausted. he is SOOOO cute!!!! I can't wait to see you guys!!! CONGRATULATIONS!

Tyson and Courtney said...

What a beautiful post with such wonderful memories for you guys! I am so happy that everything has worked out so perfectly, you deserve it. Skyler is perfect. I really want to bring you dinner, maybe after your mom and sister leave would be most helpful? Let me know!