Wednesday, January 14, 2009

1,2,3,4.........

OK - so I know....not everyone enjoys the gushy posts....but I am gushy (and I don't just mean my bottom!) Sunday after church, Joel told me about a couple in the ward that is divorcing after 17 years. Joel said that the guy said his wife was just making his life *&%#!!! I asked for details, and Joel didn't have any.....but I felt a little bit defensive for the wife - mainly because I am one.....but because I can see how being frustrated with ones spouse - can make it very easy to make their lives *&%#! We started talking....which lead to us "intensely discussing" some of the situations in our marriage - nothing major might I add...just the little vexations that plague ANYONE who is married ( don't you DARE try to tell me - NOT US....OUR marriage is WONDERFUL) EVERYONE - I repeat EVERYONE has vexations with their spouse from time to time. ANYWAY.....after we finished discussing.....I just sat there - and thought - MAN......he just really doesn't get it at ALL.....and then I sat there thinking some more....realizing that it was perhaps ME who didn't get it at all......In my defense - I will tell you that it is not hard for me at ALL to admit my weaknesses and faults when it comes to our marriage issues....but I hate the feeling of "he just doesn't understand me"...because after 15 years of being married....well shouldn't we be "getting" eachother by now? So....I did what we are told to do - find the GOOD things about our spouses......find the wonderful amazing things that we LOVE about them.....and for me - well it is just TOO easy to find the good. For those of you who don't know.....Joel gets up at 4:15 every morning to be to work at 5. He doesn't usually get home until after 7pm...and doesn't take a lunch....because he doesn't want to spend the money.....he takes almost EVERY Saturday and gives it to Cassie for what they both lovingly call "Daddy Daughter Day". He is in the Elders Quorum Presidency.....and helps every family move, goes on ward visits every Tuesday....teaches lessons on Sunday, and schedules the building for cleaning. I NEVER NEVER NEVER have to remind him to put the toilet seat down.....NEVER......NOT ONCE has he ever forgotten to put it down. He ALWAYS takes out the trash....without being asked.....EVER. And guess what.....after working ALL day - he will finish eating his dinner and start doing the DISHES....because he knows how much I hate doing the dishes. He is one of the TOP Executive Counselors at work - IN THE ENTIRE COMPANY....and bought me a BEAUTIFUL new home....and car in the past year. He honors his Priesthood, has a sweet and humble testimony of The Gospel, is a worthy Temple Recommend Holder, tolerates my dog, tells me ALL THE TIME how Beautiful he thinks I am. Plays with his neices and nephews....and ESPECIALLY his daughter - not because he has to, but because he wants to.......AND THEY ADORE HIM!!! Goes to the box and gets the mail every day - which doesn't sound like a big deal - but here in AZ....they don't deliver the mail to your house - and he KNOWS how I obsess if the mail is left in the box!! He is willing to run ENDLESS erands....and has even gone BACK to the store if I forgot to put something on the list......Is REALLY bad about doing projects around the house, but is SO proud of his wife when she does!! AND....if his schedule wasn't full enough - he is enrolled in school to get his degree - AND finds time to set up football/basketball contests....Play ball as often as he can.....and LOVES HIS WIFE!!! WHEW.......no wonder he is tired when he comes home at night!!! SO - as easy as it is to find the things that he DOESN'T do right - or to say that he doesn't understand me......He does - he TOTALLY gets me - and I am lucky to have him.....I hope he knows that - and if he doesn't......well..........I LOVE YA BABE!!!

4 comments:

Debbie Hadley said...

Okay, I love that song! I've never heard it before. I also love, love, LOVE that picture of Joel and Sidney! You are such a great wife and Joel is definitly the perfect husband for you. You married a good man!

Dan, Pam and Family said...

Great post.
Marriage reminds me of opposition in all things. To truly know someone, and be able to see and love their skills and talents also comes with learning to live with and appreciate their weaknesses as well.

Joel is awesome, and so are you Jess.
It's fun to watch the two of you compliment each other. I love you both!
Pam
P.S. Cool song, it is new to me too

Leslie said...

Beautiful tribute to your "guy." Sounds like you've figured out the keys to being married happily ever after! Cute pictures, great words, and leave it to you to know the perfect song!
P.S. Allison walked by and said, "Oooh! Cute blog!"

Cindy Smith said...

You definitely found a keeper there. I know it is too easy sometimes to see the bad and miss the good, but you've definitely found the good You are a great example to the rest of us.

We just had our anniversary, and I was glad that we've come to the point where we can decide to not get each other girts and that's OK, what's important is that we are still together.